Introducing Volcanoes on the Air
Recent issues with the SOTA MT have resulted in me having to take a stand. There has been too much discussion of P150 versus P100, too much discussion around fairness and the like. I can only conclude that the source of the problem is neither the MT nor the various associations in question or their managers. The problem, clearly, is prominence. Therefore, starting today, 1 April 2015 at 0000 UTC, I am announcing a new mountain based radio program with a much clearer set of criteria, the E1000 criteria.
E? What is E? I hear you say. It could stand for many things – East, England, Eejit, Extreme or Eruption. Introducing….. Volcanoes on the Air (VOTA)!
Tired of activating a boring P150 mountain, surrounded by tall pines, struggling to get four contacts? Activate a treeless E5 fumerole instead!
Points will be awarded on the basis of time since eruption.
- Any volcano that has erupted in the past 1000 years (E1000) will be worth 1 point.
- Any volcano that has erupted in the past 500 years (E500) will be worth 2 points.
- Likewise, E300 is 4 points
- E100 is 6 points
- E50 is 8 points
- E10 is 10 points
Any volcano, whether above ground, subterranean or underwater is eligible, but activation must occur within 25 vertical meters of the point furthest from the Earth’s center. So – people of the DM association, take heart, those English MT folks will have no summits to activate on their mainland! Of course, neither will you nor for that matter will any VKs – but this is a minor point in the grand scheme of things. This is the price we pay for not living near a plate boundary.
Additionally, there will be two sets of bonus points available:
- A 3 point “Eruption Bonus”, for any activation on a currently erupting volcano
- A additional 5 points “Fatality Bonus”, as a consolation if you should be unfortunate enough to lose your life while activating a currently erupting volcano.
Certificates will be awarded at the 100 points, 250 points and 500 points level.
In honour of those activators that have truly exceeded expectations and reached the 1000 point mark, the title of “Loof Lirpa” will be bestowed upon them, from an ancient Nepalese dialect meaning “Man/Swine/Idiot who climbs/runs from/disappears on the fiery hill/glowing mountain/death trap”.
Any activator reaching the 1000 point mark will be required to prove their activations through photographs, active peer-reviewed vulcanological research, or evidence of recovered or recovering third degree burns. A small trophy or headstone (your choice) will be provided for any activator reaching the 1000 point mark.
A fatality bonus will be awarded for any activation on presentation by the next of kin of a death certificate signed by a registered medical practitioner.
Chasers can also claim points, and certificates too will be awarded at the 100, 250 and 500 points levels. For those dedicated chasers who reach the level of 1000 points will also receive the title of “!Ngxx!u” (the ! represent tongue clicks that cannot be easily romanized), from an African dialect meaning “Man who never leaves house to chase the lion” or “Scaredy-cat”.
A Volcano to Volcano challenge will also exist. Those reaching 1000 points will be bestowed with the title “馬鹿と友だちはとても焼けています” from the Japanese, “He who plays with fire is badly burnt along with his friend.”
So, good luck to all, and may all your flows be non-pyroclastic!
The VOTA MT (me) cares not one iota about your safety. If, in any attempt to meet a quota, or to be a big-noter, you remove yourself from the biota, or even if a simple injury occurs, the MT will take no responsibility, nor will any correspondence be entered into (particularly if the correspondence describes injuries to scrota). If you don’t like that, become a boater or stick with SOTA.
Update: Well, this turned out to be a popular post; so popular in fact, I’m publishing a list of VOTA references. Click here for the list for 2015. A link combining SOTA and VOTA references can be found here. This is pulled from the Global Volcanism Project, run by the Smithsonian, and consists of dated and undated Holocene volcanoes. For the purposes of VOTA, this data is canonical. Remember, I take no responsibility for anything regarding this page. You’re on your own. Participation in VOTA voids any perceived obligations between you and I, real, implied or otherwise.